When Carl asked the Brices to bring their whole family to therapy, everyone in the family knew intuitively what that meant. Their whole world would be exposed: all its caring, its history, its anger, its anxiety. All in one place at once time, subject to the scrutiny and invasion of a stranger. And that was too much vulnerability. With its own unconscious wisdom, the family elected Don to stay home and test the therapists. Did we really mean everybody? Would we weaken and capitulate if they didn't bring Don?They had something to gain by the strategy. If we were hesitant and unconfident in our approach to their defiance, they would know that they could not trust us with the boiling cauldron of feeling which their family contained. If we were decisive and firm, they would guess that maybe we could handle the stresses which they intuitively knew had to be brought out into the open. One way or another, they had to find out how much power we had. In the meantime, they postponed facing that mysterious electricity, that critical mass, the whole family. Perhaps they thought they could be spared what Zorba called the full catastrophe.Augustus Y. Napier
About This Quote
Carl's request to the Brices to bring their whole family to therapy was a deep sense of care and concern for the family. Carl wanted to help them in any way that he could, even if it meant overstepping the boundaries of his own profession. Carl knew that asking the Brices to bring their whole family to therapy would be very difficult, but he felt it was something they needed. Carl felt strongly that this would be better than leaving it up to Don, so he asked Don to stay home.
Carl is like a parent who asks their child not to play with dangerous things because they don't want them to get hurt, but doesn't mention it until after they've broken something. By doing this, Carl is allowing the Brices some time to think about what they're about to do and confirm that it's really what they want.
Source: The Family Crucible: The Intense Experience Of Family Therapy
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